Faith??
Do I have faith??
what kind of faith??
will it endure??
should i keep it??
do i, if i, will i, get something by having it??
first issues first.
all the faiths prevalent talk about, praise the Lord.
Most of them; Pujaas, havans, salaats, masses, gurbaanee, etc. talk about ...
praise the lord, invoke the lord, tell him we are meek, tell him "you are the greatest".
Is lord so praise hungary??
Does he need to listen to the same praiseworthy notes, from each and every one, over and over again??
Is there a need for this fact to be established over and again, that we are truly week and he the strongest. If it’s a fact, it’s a fact.. aint it??
let me talk about the regularity of praises in the faith i have followed….
The regularity of praises to the lord is one of the basic pillars to which my faith belongs.
The first one is…one “should” have absolute faith, on the faith.. that this is "the faith" then, the “unquestioning” belief in one and only one source and the man (pbuh) who channalised "the faith" from the source, to us meek humans.
They say if u question ur belief then the belief is not true, it’s a farce, a fallacy. But if u r endowed with some outlandishly placed grey cells into the uppermost part of ur body, how could u not. I mean inquisitiveness is just one of the most intriguing truths about the human mind.. isn’t it? So if u have got it… and u do think and u do try to figure out, find out things.. you would certainly question!!
As a child, if u r born in a certain faith, and you ask these questions.. u r told “it is because it is!”.. and it slowly settles down into ur psyche.. that “it is” and it sort of gets imbibed into u like ur own limb. “You have a hand because u have it”.. I mean that is what probably most common answer be, if asked the reason for having a hand… Do u have some other answer… ?... Errrr…… Ok… lets not deviate from the topic and continue with what we initially started.
I was born into a certain faith, and when I came to understand things, it had already settled into me as my own culture, roots, my ethos, values, system; as my way of life. No questions asked.
And when I could start asking, my questions had outgrown the familia.
Another pillar my faith proposes more or less says this… one “should” tell thy lord, in specified actions and in specified words, at least certain minimum times each day each at specific times, about his greatness ( people optionally choose to ask for stuff for, themselves and their kinds, in their own words )!!.... If u do this more... you get more rewards.
Rewards…. Ahem….!!
Now I state this take on the prayers, just an example, which also tells how questions arise and however petty but how infusing might they be.
Fanatically (in)sane ablutions – its “prescribed” that I should pray… - no probs, certain times a day… - no probs, at specific times….. - no probs, and should clean self of the dirt, both physical and mental, necessarily before committing, self into prayers …. – still no probs.
I have to keep my mind body and soul clean… perfect…!!
But, I would no longer be deemed clean even if I even get a nasty thought once I have cleansed myself…meaning, if I have performed the ablution! (it would be ok to have the so called unclean stuff, say with my wife for that sake…Ahem..)
Now take this… I might figuratively screw an imaginative hot babe some time; take note that I haven’t still corrupted my self physically… this mental stuff… it happens, I don’t have control… “I am a meek human being”.. and above all its nature… I am made that way.
If this happens… I am no longer clean…
Now what do I do….
Viola.. there is a way out… I can cleanse myself, again…(so painstaking.. :( ).. how.. wash the face hands and feet… err.. What happened to the mind, its still the same.
Ok cleansing of the mind would mean trying and stopping the thought. Ok tried… done…
But then why physically clean face hands and feet, on top of it…. Errr… its necessary…!!
Ahem..!!
Now just think of a guy fresh on his initial days, with his legally wedded half, immediately after marriage, and lets for assumptions sake, say he followed all the “good things” specified in the faith, would also mean he had never been with a women, “that way”!! If he still chooses to follow all the prescribed practices, If he has the naturally put in and new found inclinations towards “the newfound act”…. Including his imaginations…. Would he actually be worthy performing those prayers any part of the day.. Ahem…. And guess how many ablutions. !!
Whatever… I still do it… :(.. and I continue with my fanatically sane ablutions… I am not married yet .. though.. :(.. lets keep the other part of the prior statement, further, unspecified, for inexplicable reasons…;)
This is just a really “petty” example. I could NOT get the reasons for much bigger WHYs??.
Intoxicants, man women relationships, outrageously flashy lifestyles, prohibition of free imagery, etc.
Now lets come to some closely prevalent other faiths, other schools of known faiths. (to me offcourse).
If we come to them, then I think they are even worse in terms of answering questions.
Christianity – the largest followed in the world, it has a suspicious base itself, it has been the most evolving religion. Strangely established by the influential few of the gone era, who are known to have changed the history itself, the books itself, to safeguard some “strange” unknown interests. Whatever is prevalent today is again something which is governed by some secretly elected leaders who govern the rules and the ethics for the souls of the rest of the world, following it. Some how it vaguely matches the preaching’s by the original preachers of the greatness of the king, his kingdom, the holy mother and the son. I feel, it somehow, does not have much to offer about the intricacies about the life and the problems people do face in their lives, except basking in the glory of … Ahem Ahem!!. To top it all almost all different regions have all different, self moulded, interpretations of the original “faith”.
Budhism – One simple, funda… Question… ( I like it.. :) ), whom.. ( ahem.. :( )… search for urself… how… ( ahem .. :( ).. the eternal search of the truth… I don’t deny… May be it is possible to attain that stage of salvation… but to know “how” itself… would take u God knows where …. is there some thing for … humble .. meek human beings like me…. :(
Hinduism – I simply don’t understand this, it appears more like a culture, rather then a religion or an established faith. The faith if there is any, in people following it, is their own established, to their own chosen deities. Ahem… let me invent one more deity for myself.
Now where do I go and find answers to my problems...... :(
Do I have a problem…? I guess I do.. :(
I still stick to what I was born as…. !!
Now a paradox that came into my mind sometime back while discussing similar issues with a friend.
Most of us guys of whichever school of faith u belong…. ( good ol Lord left some common things between the propagated teachings among all )..
Each of them talk about destiny. What is destiny?
The dictionary meaning – “the apparently predetermined and inevitable series of events that happen to somebody or something”.
If I ask somebody, do u believe in destiny, most common answer would be, YES ( lets for the time being leave those who claim, “I make my own destiny”.. huh …as he knows what going to happen to him tomorrow.. :) ).
So to say you believe in the fact that there is a predefined set of events that are going to happen in most of our lives ………. at least believing this is better than, leaving all the events as complete chance in terms of probability. If everything is just by a chance thing, then there would be complete disorder within .. umm ….I guess seconds around the globe. I mean, what ever theory u put in, what ever science u apply, if all the events are purely non interdependent and by chance, then who/how would u explain the perfectly “regular events” we see in the day today life. Sun rises in the east…:) .. Ahem… for those for whom, the previous statement was cryptic……..
Ok, lets come back to the paradox. Belief in destiny!
My next question would be, do you pray? Do you ask for “stuff” from your sweet ol lord?
Now here also, a lot would say, no I don’t, or I don’t have time enough and all that. But to be true, at one point or the other, which ever of you are not complete Atheists, would have prayed at least once in ur life, asking for stuff from God.
So… isn’t it a paradox… If destiny is to be believed, which I guess all the faiths do propagate, that it is to be believed in, then what for do you ask for. You anyways have what u are destined to get, and you will what u are destined to get.
And yes, faiths also do say, if u ask ur lord enough and he is pleased, u shall have it. Ahem…. !! lo there goes ur destiny!!.
Footnote:
There is something I like about my faith, though, as compared to other ones.
It gives a proper guideline for almost… “well almost”… all the possible issues about you and ur life, the guidelines and the ways to follow those guidelines. It tells you how to lead an ideal life. None others talk about the problems and the guidelines in such detail. Should I say, it is the best then… in these terms.
But there again is a catch. A certain chunk of these guidelines start to look a little absurd. What I think is because they were stated/fixed… (or may be the word of God actually… who knows.. L) .. some fifteen hundred yrs back, may be a good long term planning was also done, but it looks like we are ushering into the era beyond that “long term” of the original plan.
Now, how this plan might have come in place,…..possibilities.. u know!!
My take… and for this, the Prophet ( pbuh ) is the most respectable Man in the history I know. Probably he was/is the most intellectual minds of all times. The perfect leader, manager, planner, preacher and propagator. He understood the problems of the mankind …( of his times )… could figure out solutions, and propagate them. As the solutions were incomparable and the best…. There, then, incubated was a cult following… I too am a generation of that cult.
I don’t really want to mean that, I am not left with faith, over, in the first place. What I am saying is I think my faith actually never started, consciously…..I think, I have been unconsciously following what I have always been with. Whatever for, I am doomed any whichever ways. And there is no place else but hell for me in my afterlife.
Infact I was "destined" ( Ahem Ahem.. ) to burn in there, when I questioned it in the first place… :)
But I do still follow it, for the fear of the unknown. What if.... What If.. I don’t, the so called hell of afterlife is what I have to live right now, here… in this life.
I am right now trying to search the answers, the meanings to what I know… and hoping, that may be there are flaws in my knowledge, may be it is not enough to provide answers….hope, it does attain that level, where there are answers.
If you try and go to the scholars, the so called learned ones, to certain things, which have now become unavoidable.. they say, the interpretations in the initial times were not correctly made, and they change the interpretations …. Rest remains same…. The same history, same pedagogy, same scriptures, the epics, the books, the verses...
Interpretation is what changes with time, with eras.
then whats the point….. unexplicably changing interpretations of the same established faith... at ur convenience ….
ummm doesnt go down well..
And that is where the faith gets infiltrated, permeated.....!!
I think guys who have proclaimed themselves to be non believing kinds and say, they are not made for the faith, the atheists, who don’t care about it, don’t worry about this whole issue…. are happier, perhaps.
I think guys with one track fanatic, thought process, are the most satisfied, probably, if not the most happy. The guy blowing himself to smithereens with a plane on some economically very advanced towers, to devastate the Morales of whole anti-his-belief population, might have done it with such pride that meek questioning humans like me could not even fathom in years.
I also think that guys who have come to terms with this dilemma and say, why bother, lets just do what everybody else around me does, are also happier then me, cause they simply don’t bother…. :)
Soo… that goes to say.. I must be a disturbed soul. Am I ?… or Am I ?
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